The Emotional Stages of a First Time House Buyer

Buying your first house is a life-changing decision and even with the most straightforward of applications, there are always things that pop up that you can never quite prepare for.  It's a journey full of emotions from the excitement of looking for your dream home, to the agonising and tense wait of house and mortgage offers. I always knew that applying for a mortgage wouldn't leave me skipping down the street to the bank, but I never expected it to give me the rollercoaster of emotions that it did. Today I've decided to reflect on the emotions I've had so far through my house buying process to let first time buyers know that you are not alone - it's such a momentous time in your life and it's bound to have anxiety attached to it, but also you shouldn't let this anxiety ruin your happiness because eventually you will own your dream home and it will be worth it.


The first emotion that any first-time buyer will experience is excitement. It is a very exciting time looking through houses and knowing that one of them could eventually be yours.  There's the thrill of being able to start planning your dream bedroom, bathroom and kitchen and knowing that when the house is yours, no landlord is in your way.

Self doubt

Once you've picked the house and it's time to get the mortgage, the self-doubt phase kicks in. S*** suddenly gets real and you have to be an adult and talk about complex financial decisions and prove that you're capable of managing your own money - not great when you look at your last three bank statements and realise that almost half of your wage goes on clothes shopping. You become critical of everything, analyse every fine detail and regularly ask yourself 'why would a banker trust me with a mortgage?'


Once you've had the two-hour long bank meeting,  it is a waiting game to see if your mortgage has been accepted. Even though mine was processed within the space of three days, it felt like forever. The hours creep by, you check your phone every five minutes and then Google makes you paranoid when you accidentally stubble upon forums of people discussing their failed mortgage applications. You wake up every morning thinking, will this be the day I find out?


All being well, your mortgage will have been accepted and you enjoy your temporary state of relief - the bank thinks you're good to go and you can begin to feel optimistic. You can finally pop the fizz, have a quick 'yay us' moment and after a long, tiring wait, you are able to have a good night sleep before the next section of hard work begins.


The emotions of the last few days, weeks and months finally catch up with you and you begin to feel irritable and tired, but the hard work isn't over yet. You have to make sure the solicitor is in place, liaise with the bank and make sure all the paperwork is organised from your side. You feel drained all you want is a few days curled up on the sofa watching Netflix but don't lose sight of the finish line.

Second thoughts

Buying a house is one of the biggest financial decisions you will make and something you will be paying off for a considerable time of your life (unless you're super rich), so it's normal that at some part of the process you will begin to have second thoughts. These can range from thinking the house isn't quite big enough to being worried about the location and whether it is somewhere you would still want to live in 20 years time.

Last minute panic

Once the solicitors are involved and you have your eyes on the completion date, last minute panic will set in.  It's the stage where the banks do their final checks and where you are so close to owning a home that it feels like a reality. The last-minute panic sets in as you realise the end is in sight and you don't want anything to go wrong and jeopardise it.


Right now I'm in the last minute panic stage, but I'm sure once everything is signed on the dotted line, the house is in our name and we have our own home, that the ultimate feeling will be elation. That euphoria of knowing you've done this - yes, you, the person who thought that going a month without Starbucks would be difficult or the person who never looked to the future and lived in the moment. There will definitely be a big bottle of champagne with my name on it when this is done and the process is finally over.



  1. This is definitely helpful! My husband and I are saving up for a house so I will definitely try to remember that these emotions will be on the way, whenever that happens.

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  3. Buying a home for the first time? The emoyional stager of a first time house buyer resonates deeply, charting the whirlwind of feelings from the first viewing to getting the keys. It's like students feeling swamped and then finding relief when they decide to buy coursework. Life's all about ups and downs!

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